You are looking at the successful completee of nearly 10 hours of database website informational training. And you thought that you learned a lot in college! Sometimes, I wonder why I even bothered to learn how to use the internet before this job, because I was clearly using it so inadequately. I never realized that every day, I was performing a small miracle as I used multiple-tab browsing while researching term papers and shopping online simultaneously. I’m kind of like the Albert Schweitzer of the internet.
The main thing I REALLY DON’T GET about online trainings is that in real life, it’s probably hard to use all the programs I’m learning to use, but the trainings never cover what to do when the search function stops working, but they are quite comprehensive on the myriad ways to search for someone named “Mary.” They don’t tell you what will happen after the website shuts down, but they make damn well sure that you know of about 80 different ways to find the “Home” page.
In other news, I’ve eaten a jar of salsa in two days, and I’m pretty sure my sink is clogged, but I’m approaching that in stages by using my bathroom sink to wash dishes. Each of these is a clear indication that the old me is not disappearing completely. I also had a dream about beer, kind of in the way that I used to dream about summer when I was in high school.
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